...was the day my little Atticus was born. I'm sorry to say that it was not a happy day. Right now it is 10:24 p.m. One year ago this minute I was on morphine, our sweet little boy was on a ventillator, and James was feeling lost in between us. It was two more days before I was allowed to leave my bed long enough to go see my tiny son, and another day before I could hold him.
I wanted so much for his arrival in this world to be a happier event. I ached to hold him and rock him and kiss his sweet head. I wanted him to sleep next to me so I could listen to him breathe, and hold him on my chest so he could hear my heart.
And although I will freely admit the blessings we all received during this difficult time and the unforseen benefits of Atty's hospital time, I so so so wished it to be different.
But tonight I rocked him to sleep and kissed his sweet head and told him how wonderful he is and how happy I am that he's here. Tonight I got to do what I missed out on a year ago. Tonight I get to listen to him breathe in his sleep and marvel at how absolutely beautiful he is.
I'll post about today's festivities tomorrow. Tonight I just want to bask in the wonder of our son, our sweet Atticus, and how far he's come. We love you, little boy, more than you will ever know. You are the treasure of our lives.
1 comment:
What a blessing! Thank you for sharing this.
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